Tuesday, February 7, 2012

it's not how it looks

Interactions don't come as easy some days, the words are clumsy, the patience short and I'm relieved to retreat to the sanctuary amid boxes of ephemeral materials and old photos to listen to tunes and admire long-gone Egyptian Revival structures since torn down in the name of progress, immortalized in slides an inch or so across.


Someone calls me a saint today for keeping my cool and I think of how often I don't, that I freely confess to moments of fleeting fury, unacknowledged bitterness, and frequent agnostic emotions. I believe, help me in my unbelief could be the story of my life, because I all too often don't live like I do. Maybe no one does, and it's not the point, and maybe the perfectionism comes from seeing the mistakes continue to reverberate. I sometimes wonder if I make the gestures of peace to calm my soul alone, because so often we'd rather exist in the discord.

5 comments:

  1. you could be cursing fig trees

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  2. Yeah, you really do need to mellow out. Om Om Om. Discord's easier even as it saps rigor leading to fumbling & stumbling. Well played, entropy.

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  3. and you really do need to listen to that song, because while it is PJ Harvey, it sounds Rome-esque (minor key sparseness about World War I and whatnot).

    Old lady naps that turn into 12 hours of sleep improve one's mood considerably as well.

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  4. You had me at, well, Rome. Yay, ye old school stuff, and old lady/man naps.

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  5. http://blog.onbeing.org/post/17321026424/live-video-in-the-room-with-kevin-kling-by-trent

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