i feel the half that is missing...

it's cold in my apartment, a weekend that began with my dad in the hospital again getting more blood transfusions for another internal bleed, running errands for my mom, picking him up the next day, all of the family coming in for her birthday last night, going out with Kentinista ladies for smart lady talks, out to the east side for a friend's birthday and getting existential about the state of the city while driving through the hood. I got news that a friend's kid ran away and that he's now okay, I'd run away too given the situation. I attempted to counsel friends on relationships (while ignoring once again the problems inherent in our own), rigged up the milk crate to the back of the three-speed for errand running and bike-riding in weather too cold for such things due to the cabin fever, getting frustrated as people fall of the wagon again and again and knowing there's not much one can do.

And now I've awakened after passing out on the couch early and cancelling plans due to strange bone chills, feeling a little sad when he says we're so much alike and I can only think of the irreconcilable differences that make those compatibilities irrelevant, is it sickness or the drop in temperature or a tired body finally dealing with the weight of the mind, it's hard to say, probably a bit of everything...