It was cold when I awoke this morning, shivering on my drive into the station, playing records and having a cathartic morning playing songs that have continually soundtracked all my interpersonal dilemmas.
And to my surprise we do. I have no expectations as to change because experience tells me it's unlikely. I get anxious because I know the bitterness within me that would only grow if I waited longer, that it tends to dissipate when I see our common humanity. But the words pour out so much more gently, so much more thoroughly, all the things that are so wrong right now, all the things I can't live with and that you can't continue to live by. There are apologies for our respective thoughtlessness and lack of self-control. I say I need no excuses, no well-intentioned words, let's just start fresh from here. a weight from my soul has been lifted because reconciliation is beautiful, because this is what my God gives us in spite of our constant failures, and this is what we need to give to others in spite of ourselves, in spite of what happens, not because it's fun or it'll happen the way we want, but because it is right.